


butterfly effect

by lliania



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Character Study, Drabble Format, Ed is a lone wolf, Female Edward Elric, Genderbending, Multi, Older Edward Elric
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-10
Updated: 2019-07-11
Packaged: 2020-06-25 19:28:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19752301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lliania/pseuds/lliania
Summary: As Ed lies in the pool of blood from her severed legs, all she could think of was that her baby brother must not - can not - see her attempt at bringing their mother back to life. This was her fuckup - her personal hell - and she can’t drag him into it.(The AU that explores what can happen if Ed was 5 years older and female to boot)





	1. end

As Ed lies in the pool of blood from her severed legs, all she could think of was that her baby brother must not - can not - see her attempt at bringing their mother back to life. This was her fuckup - her personal hell - and she can’t drag him into it. So she plows through the pain and the haze and attempts to drag herself to the unmoving body in the middle of the room. It is only by sheer will that she reaches it. As soon as she does, she claps her hands and buries the bodily remains underground with her alchemy.

It’s only then that she allows herself to waver. She barely even registers that Al will see her bloody mess when he wakes up (which will become _his_ personal hell) before she falls into unconsciousness.

It was just one fuck up after another. 


	2. beginning

_"Sister! You’re awake."_

Ed stares blankly into the ceiling of the Rockbells’ clinic. Waking up after her failed transmutation attempt had been a harrowing affair. Fucking up the transmutation alone had already been awful. Comforting an distressed Al who had to go through the ordeal of finding his sister bleeding to death on their floorboards made everything ten times worse.

_"I heard a noise and went to your room. You weren't there so I checked father's study. I... you were there and there was just... So much blood. I didn’t know what to do so I ran here. Granny patched you up _—_ to- to lessen the blood loss — and then we brought you here."_

This was probably the first time her baby brother ever been this upset with her. Al had always seemed in awe of her for as long as she can remember.

_"Is mom? Were you able to bring her back?"_

Even when they lost their mom, Al had never never blamed her. He gets upset and angry. But never at her.

_"You’re so stupid! I want mother back too but I don’t want to lose you."_

“Edith, go to sleep,”

_"Sister, promise me you won’t do this again. Don’t leave me alone. I can’t—"_

Ed smiles ruefully and closes her eyes.

"Don’t leave me alone."

**Author's Note:**

> i am incredibly rusty. i wanted to write more before i post anything but i think i'll end up abandoning this completely if i did that. so apologies if my writing goes all over the place
> 
> also ed is female just because i feel more comfortable writing in the female perspective. i don't want to overthink more than i already do.
> 
> also, no pairing/s as of now but it'll happen if it's supposed to happen. i'm just going with the flow atm. i'll try to update daily as long as i can think of scenarios for this 'verse.


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